And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Randomize
