I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
