How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize