By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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