omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
