I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
