I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
