Your tits are I can't wait for
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
