So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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