butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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