When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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