Got a toothbrush?
Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
