I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
