i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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