The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
