I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
