he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
