we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
