8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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