yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Randomize