dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
