Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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