Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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