By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
