what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize