im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
