WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize