in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
