I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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