the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
