quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
3 2 1 whiskey
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize