I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
