i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
