tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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