When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
