ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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