We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
