normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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