If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
