there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
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