I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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