Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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