So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
