The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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