Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize