why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize