"it" just moved
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
