That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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