he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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