we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
