Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
